The Kids Were All Right

Posted in Rock 'n' Roll at 12:05 pm by George Smith

Crazy mean Ted Nugent was at Northern Michigan University recently. To talk to students.

It’s amusing on many levels, since Ted’s a gold-plated fool and schools are theoretically supposed to be devoted to broadening one’s horizons, rather than narrowing them to a Nugent-y crabbishness. On the other hand, a Nugent lecture could be considered mind-expanding if you actually are someone who has managed not to be exposed to enough examples of the everyday contemptible.

This was in Marquette, paradoxically the center of Bart Stupak’s district.

The Motor City Madman once had political aspirations. However, his antipathy toward unions, the auto industry and minorities — he uses the codewords ‘entitlement bloodsuckers’ — guarantee he’s unelectable in any of Michigan’s more populated areas.

Which makes Stupak’s district perfect for Ted.

The Democrat is retiring, run out for making himself the asshole of the health care reform fight. Second, since Marquette is about the size of Pottsville in Schuylkill County, PA — which is demographically similar, that means the voters — other than students, are just mostly white, old and Fox News addicts.

Anyway, here are a few laughers from an interview with Ted in the NMU student newspaper:

Nugent: I am getting used to some pathetic Americans acting like wannabe Euro sheep, going out of their way to intentionally misrepresent truth, logic and the American Way. I think they are funny, funny people, and I thank them for identifying me as the obvious good guy. God bless them all.

Student interviewer: How would you define “Hate speech?” Do you think that you have ever engaged in it?

Nugent: I would hope sensible people would know hate anything when they see or hear it. The evil, inbred rhetoric of the soulless KKK would be hate speech, I hope, to everyone. I have never engaged in anything remotely related to such intellectual vacuity. On the contrary, I have fought hard against it. [What a scrupulously honest and self-examing fellow is Mr. Suck-On-My-Machine Gun. — DD]

Student interviewer: One of the reasons the alternative presentation has been organized is that many don’t think your statements encourage positive discussion pertaining to issues such as gun control and freedom of speech. What do you have to say about this?

Nugent: I shall elaborate the transparency of such asinine allegations and those that foolishly allege them on April 13. Bring your friends. This is gonna be fun.

If you’ve seen Ted on Fox News, you would bet his student appearance was unspectacular. Nugent can be counted on to be a paradigm of repetition, never departing from his standard political pitch as the white he-man battling Fedzilla, fighting for your freedom, like everyone else in the GOP.

According to the North Wind newspaper, students organized alternatives to Nugent-furnished boredoms:

For those who didn’t want to see Nugent, the Sticks and Stones event, hosted by various groups across campus, featured speakers about different forms of hate speech.

While Ted may think he doesn’t do hate speech, the distinction’s a fine one. And he’s on the wrong side of it, easy. For his better or worse, that’s how decent people think of him these days no matter how much Ted smiles, chuckles and breaks his arm patting himself on the back for allegedly being a jolly good fellow.

And this is from DD, someone who paid cash money for Nugent’s last two records.

Ted, in fact, isn’t very courageous at all. He jabbers about truth and speaking his mind but only does it in print or in interview.

His great gift of expression is through guitar. But you will never see Ted compose an album of songs based on what he really thinks.

Ted Nugent is chicken — buck, buck, squawwwwk — because he knows what would happen if he chanced it.

Never fear, DD knows Nugent’s music well enough to take a stab at what a new album should really look like.

Track listing:

1. Death to Tyrants (You Know Who)
2. Get Off My Land
3. Hey Fatty! (Get Sick & Die)
4. Parasite
5. Rich Kings & Poor Scum
6. Quarantine (Sodomites)
7. Union Huntin’
8. (Hands Off My Pile) Bloodsucker
9. The Great White Man-alo
10. Raghead Punks
11. Mr. Massey, Good Friends & a Bottle of Whine
12. HateSpeechin’

1 Comment

  1. Dick Destiny » Infame = the new fame for Ted said,

    July 8, 2010 at 3:14 pm

    […] Here, previously on the same topic at DD blog. […]