01.04.17
The freshest bullshit: STEMpathy
Software, artificial intelligence and robots will never have what the Tin Man eventually got (or, rather, always had) in The Wizard of Oz. It’s Tom Friedman’s newest kick only he doesn’t have the Tin Man, he has a friend you’ve never heard of, “Dov Seidman, C.E.O. of LRN, which advises companies on leadership and how to build ethical cultures ..” That’s LRN, presumably pronounced learn, only like — shorter by two letters and in ALL CAPS.
“[What] will enable us to continue to create social and economic value?” asks Friedman. “The answer, [the LRNer told him], “is the one thing machines will never have: ‘a heart.’ ???
And the people who will win the jobs of today and tomorrow will be those who know science and math and who also have heart.
You see, I have science, math, and technology but no heart, presumably. Heart is rare and up until now thought not particulary necessary as a talent or skill. Right?
“I call these STEMpathy jobs,” continues Friedman in his dig for more of just the right nose gold. “[Jobs] that combine STEM (science, technology, engineering, math) skills with human empathy, like the doctor who can extract the best diagnosis from IBM’s Watson on cancer and then best relate it to a patient.”
STEMpathy doctor: “You have stage IV esophageal cancer, Mr. Schmidt. IBM’s Watson has poured over the result of our scans and the literature and the average prognosis is six to eight weeks. In that time we will first use whole brain radiation to slow the growth of metastatic tumors in your head so that they don’t interfere with two weeks of subsequent chemotherapy …”
All right, that example really isn’t a good illustration.
Perhaps Friedman has an even better one up his sleeve? Well, no.
The STEMpathy workers are represented as being about or in something called Paint Nite:
No wonder one of the fastest-growing U.S. franchises today is Paint Nite, which runs paint-while-drinking classes for adults. Bloomberg Businessweek explained in a 2015 story that Paint Nite “throws after-work parties for patrons who are largely lawyers, teachers and tech workers eager for a creative hobby.???
“Raise your glass to a NEW kind of night out!” it reads. “Paint Nite® invites you to create art over cocktails at a local restaurant or bar, guided by a professional artist and party host.”
What does science and math have to do with a snob drunk party with painting on the side?
Don’t try to understand it. That’s the gift of Tom Friedman, a terrible writer who uses his weekly column as a venue for a nincompoop’s vision of the future.
As Matt Taibbi put it in reviewing Friedman’s latest book:
No modern writer has been lampooned more. Hundreds if not thousands of man-hours have been spent teaching robots to produce automated Friedman-prose, in what collectively is a half-vicious, half-loving tribute to a man who raised bad writing to the level of an art form … We will remember Friedman for interviewing 76 percent of the world’s taxi drivers … and for his unmatched, God-given ability to write nonsensical metaphors …”
“Leaders, businesses and communities will still leverage technology to gain advantage, but those that put human connection at the center of everything they do — and how they do it — will be the enduring winners …”
STEMpathy at drunk amateur painter parties, innovation near you. Boy howdy!
Tom Friedman, skating along on a slippery cream pie mess that represents the future.