09.29.10

Hot Jobs: For those who get erections from cluster bombs

Posted in Crazy Weapons, War On Terror, Why the World Doesn't Need US at 2:08 pm by George Smith

Here’s a story, straight from Popular Mechanics, written by and for guys who get hard-ons thinking about machines that blow foreigners up, preferably those smaller, darker and poorer.

Featured prominently on Google News, which was probably paid to display it, here are the great quotes:

How small can air-to-ground weapons get? Air Force officials are publicly suggesting the development of 1-pound munitions that could kill an individual in a crowded area without harming innocents standing nearby.

So, guys, you go stand right next to the wooden target on the test range, then. Any takers? Thought not.

[The small flying cluster bomb/anti-tank mine] spins like a maple seed as it descends, scanning the area for its targets using laser and infrared sensors.

Like a maple seed. I bet the p.r. person at Textron who came up with that description got a raise.

The 9-foot torpedo, petite enough to be carried by unmanned submarines and drone helicopters, is currently under development at Penn State University, in association with the Naval Undersea Warfare Center.

Petite. A 9-foot torpedo is petite. Who could write such s—? Someone not to be invited over for drinks and barbecue, that’s for sure.

Now, if you know some androids who throw parties where they eat bags of arsenic and roofing nails for kicks …

The work of that segment of the economy unhurt by the Great Recession. If you were in the business of making petite torpedoes and anti-tank mines that spin like maple seeds, things have been great.

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