06.30.10
Posted in Culture of Lickspittle, Phlogiston, Why the World Doesn't Need US at 2:57 pm by George Smith
One thing Paul Fussell didn’t envision when he wrote BAD in 1991: The universal adoption of mindless sucking up to wealth and celebrity as a regular trait of American character.
Good examples abound in daily newspapers. Entire sections seem to often still be turned over to lickspittle praise of business tycoons or whoever has the predicted number one movie for this week.
But Tesla’s Elon Musk surely rates a mention today for the omnipresence in recent weeks of comparisons to comic book character Tony Stark.
Originally based on the producer of Iron Man 2’s claim that his version of the Marvel Comics character was modelled on Musk. And the latter’s subsequent Stan Lee-esque cameo in the movie.
Here’s a parrot’s collection, repeated ad nauseam, in current ISOO-approved national practice for sucking up:
The [Tesla] IPO is also the first for the eccentric and charismatic Musk, who is the inspiration for Robert Downey Jr’s Tony Stark character in “Iron Man” and also — ABC News
The funny thing about Elon Musk is that he does sort of remind you of Tony Stark. Minus the Iron Man suit … — the New York Times
Musk helped inspire the film version of Tony Stark, the billionaire in the “Iron Man??? movies, director Jon Favreau wrote in Time magazine in April — Businessweek
The script is good for a Hollywood movie, compete with a messy divorce; while Musk himself is the blueprint for the Robert Downey’s character Tony Stark in … — Times LIVE
If Elon Musk and his credentials, his lifestyle, his love for women and sportscars reminds you of the Marvel comic book hero Iron Man’s common man avatar … — Entertainment and Showbiz
With skepticism mounting about the cost and adoption of pure electric cars over the next five years, investors will have to decide whether Tesla represents a high-risk, high-return bet on an emerging technology or a Silicon Valley version of “Government Motors” … Musk, the inspiration for Robert Downey Jr’s Tony Stark character in “Iron Man” who makes a blink-and-you-miss-it cameo in this summer’s sequel, sees it very differently. — Reuters
But Tesla has its strengths, including some high-profile backers. Chief among them is CEO Elon Musk, the 38-year-old entrepreneur who was an inspiration for the playboy business mogul of the Iron Man films, Tony Stark … Investors will decide for themselves whether it takes Iron Man to lift Tesla off the ground. — AP
Jon Favreau, director of “Iron Man,” calls Musk a modern-day “Renaissance man” … In an article for Time, Favreau said that he and actor Robert Downey Jr. modeled the main character in the movie — “genius billionaire Tony Stark” — after the Silicon Valley star … Musk told Time that his goal was to be “involved in things that are going to make a significant difference to the future of humanity. — Agence France Presse
Now I mentioned “Iron Man” because Robert Downey Jr. based the movie version of Tony Stark in “Iron Man” in part on this guy. Now if that’s not cool enough, keep listening, I’ve got more … We’ll be right back with the real life “Iron Man,” right after this. — CNN
The CNN interview was spectacular for its fawning treatment of Musk, who’s current business ventures wouldn’t really exist without the serious underwriting provided by the US government.
In any case, for CNN Musk said he wanted to be involved in “sustainable energy and … space exploration and particularly the expansion of life to multiple planets.”
This was immediately followed by:
But on that second point, sustainable energy, I think we really see a clear example here with the Gulf oil spill that, you know, the oil is bad in so many ways. Apart from being unsustainable, it also is a huge pollutant of the oceans, of the atmosphere and we need to get off it.
Scintillating.
But the real bell-ringer is “expansion of life to multiple planets,” quite an ambition from a guy who’s actual material contribution to making stuff, right now, is a premium sports car for really rich people and a proposed slightly less premium car for … the wealthy.
And a booster rocket to potentially cart supplies and baggage, and maybe more really wealthy people, to the great outhouse in the sky, the international space station. On the taxpayer’s dime, most — if not all — the time.
For CNN, Musk was emphasizing sustainable energy. And it’s a common trope of the sales pitch for his electric car manufacturing business.
But the electricity has to come from somewhere for a rechargeable car.
And if it comes from a wall plug at home, or any hook-up at an electric car charging station, the current infrastructure in the US still generates it through the burning of fossil fuels. Which means only that the electric car has a really long exhaust pipe — to where the power is being generated.
If it’s going to run solely off elemental hydrogen — which DD may get into later — it inherits a different set of problems. Namely, the relativey high energy needs for cracking water, if you’re not going to use hydrogen derived from fossil fuels.
The technical dimensions are described somewhat briefly here..
Manufacturing a $109,000 (after US government tax rewards) automobile for celebrities doesn’t go far in arguments for solving global warming or eyewash about sustainable energy.
However, this hasn’t stopped top journalists from lavishing praise upon the man who’s giving them celebrity privileges to drive it. Infamously, like Lesley Stahl.
Musk is almost perfect for America in 2010. Someone who delivers little, spends an awful lot, isn’t above ludicrously pleading poverty but — above all — is someone showy and adept at cultivating the right image in the culture of sucking up.
In Iron Man 2, Tony Stark was also a narcissist and a drunk.
In the comic book, as well as in the best parts of Favreau’s two movies, Stark defeated bad guys at no charge. And the people in the street, not just George Clooney or Lesley Stahl — got to enjoy it.
Twelve cents, later a quarter, originally — right here.
More on Musk’s IPO, skeptically, at the LA Times.
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06.23.10
Posted in Phlogiston, Rock 'n' Roll at 2:04 pm by George Smith
This DD tune was done a few years ago on a spur of the moment, the moment being the idea to write TV theme music for “The Amazing Harry Hoo,” an episode of Get Smart.
Bond movie songs, can’t do. Get Smart, yes!
This blog perfectly describes the Claw Craw, one of the most fondly remembered comedy villains:
The Claw … was an evil villain of Asian ancestry — a distant cousin to Bond’s “Dr. No.” The Claw was so called because one of his hands was missing, a la Captain Hook. In its place, as I recall, was a powerful shoehorn-shaped magnet. (There you go — two strikes already, both disability and ethnic stereotyping.) The Claw spoke English with a heavy accent, which was a good part of the joke. Picture Smart holding him off at gunpoint. Smart would turn to his sidekick, the lovely Agent 99 (Barbara Feldon), and say with a squinted brow, something like: “Well, 99, I see it’s our old nemesis, the Craw.”
Before 99 could respond, the villain would break in, growling: “No, not da Craw — da Craw!”
The episode is also described here.
The trick was to work the verbal joke into the instrumental. Dialogue from the show made it easy.
“The Amazing Harry Hoo” — the fictitious theme, not the episode — is here.
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06.22.10
Posted in Extremism, Phlogiston, Rock 'n' Roll, Ted Nugent at 11:24 am by George Smith
From the WaTimes column by Ted Nugent last week, a physical fitness lecture — perhaps reminiscent of Billy Bob Thornton’s Mr. Woodcock, only not as eloquent as “Set of 10!”:
Schools should augment brisk walks by also replacing goofy games during gym time with rigorous calisthenics, including jogging, sprinting, sit-ups and jumping jacks. Kids need to work up a healthy sweat and get worn out during gym class. Huffing and puffing is a good thing.
Every grade school and middle school in America should implement a brisk-walking club in the morning before school starts. Any school that doesn’t implement a before-school walking club for this coming school year should have all public funding rescinded immediately and the principal fired. I mean it.
The goal is simple. Every young person who graduates high school should be able to pass the U.S. Marines Corps fitness test.
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All of this requires effort, commitment, sacrifice and hard work.
Nothing worthwhile is ever easy or cheap. But we must do it. While America faces a number of economic and international challenges, I firmly believe there is no challenge greater than to improve the health of our young people. The blubberization of America must be reversed immediately.
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I am just a guitar player, but I worked up another serious sweat last night when I dragged my dead bear out of the Canadian wilderness. I suppose not everybody can perform such perfect hands-on physics …
And this is what happens when you cut your entertainment staff, like Creative Loafing’s Tampa operation, I presume.
In a brief interview with Ted Nugent, the newspaper’s music reporter asks, “If you had not become a musician, what do you think you’d be doing instead?”
Replies Nugent, emphasis mine:
I do so much as it is, musician, writer, speaker, hunting guide, law enforcement officer, off road racer, standup comedian, TV producer, gay rights advocate, Motown dance instructor, professional breeder, etc. etc., that I’m sure my passions would still dominate my American Dream without the music, though the thought of not rocking is rather silly.
The Nuge as a ‘gay rights advocate’ at Human Events, a publication of the far right:
Enter the debate over allowing homosexuals to openly serve in our military. What this issue boils down to is what may or may not happen to the military’s good order, discipline, morale, and unit cohesion if they are allowed to openly serve. Until someone can convince me that by allowing gays to openly serve in our military will improve our ability to wage and win wars, we should continue the 1993 law that does not permit gays to openly serve.
It is possible, I suppose, that a quietly subversive copy editor was having mischievous fun with Nugent re the ‘gay advocate’ thing.
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06.18.10
Posted in Phlogiston at 9:45 am by George Smith
It’s the newest home and garden rage for upper middle class wads in New York, according to the Times. A story on ‘catios’ rises to the top of ‘most everything’ lists compiled by the newspaper.
This link sends you out to a photo of a luxurious chicken wire pen, one you can sit in with your cats, perhaps with a glass of wine, the pets and you safely protected from the wild savagery of your fenced back yard.
You really have to see it. So do click the link.
However, what I really wanted to see was a photo of the ninnies who made it, the McCormicks, sitting on the frou-frou garden seat behind the wire.
Here in soCal, DD calls it a big chicken coop. Or a cage. But ‘catio’ is a word only a schwantz would coin.
Wealthy Americans are such innovative people, dontcha know.
DD lived with five cats for many years. They were free to come and go from the house to the backyard as they pleased. They also enjoyed climbing a bottle brush tree and walking the roof of the garage.
In the evening, they were inside.
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06.17.10
Posted in Crazy Weapons, Extremism, Phlogiston at 12:15 pm by George Smith
In the blink of an eye the Huffington Post has established itself as another flugel horn for the Cult of EMP Crazy. As well as a place where posters couldn’t be bothered in the slightest to read what their compatriots are writing on the same subject. Just as long as it all gets into the Google News feed, pronto.
“Learn more about what would happen if an EMP bomb were ever detonated in the video below,” teases Bianca Bosker.
It’s the double opportunity for National Geographic-style info-adver-tainment and catastrophism.
Dig the title:
How an EMP Bomb Would Be a Deathblow to Life as We Know It
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06.14.10
Posted in Phlogiston, Stumble and Fail at 3:08 pm by George Smith
One of the ways to tell we’re fresh out of ideas is to look at how Americans love catch phrases and their linkage to delusional thinking.
Take the use of the term “Manhattan Project.”
You can tell a nincompoop is in the room whenever you see or hear it.
Use of it is much like the usage of “If we can put a man on the Moon, we can [insert another most wished for miracle].”
“Manhattan Project” signals belief in a pretend world, one which ignores the unpleasant reality of a country presented with problems of its own devise, made insoluble by leaders and doers of its own devise.
From the Google News tab, a list of current “Manhattan Project” usages, calls for magic wand accomplishments well beyond present or imaginable future capacity.
“[A report everyone appropriately ignored, issued by a biodefense industry group masquerading as a government agency] warned that the American people needed a combination of big business and big government to protect them against the looming threat. It said the kind of close cooperation between industry and government to develop bio-war defenses had to be on a scale comparable to building aircraft carriers, putting men on the Moon or funding the Manhattan Project that created the atomic bomb.” — FOX News editorial
“A group of industry leaders, including Microsoft chairman Bill Gates and General Electric boss Jeff Immelt, stepped up calls for a Manhattan project [on energy].” — a business publication
If the guy who made Windows thinks a ‘Manhattan Project’ is needed, who can doubt such wisdom? Better not take too much time to think before you answer that.
It’s our responsibility to take alternative energy seriously. Developing wind, solar, biomass, nuclear and other solutions must become our focus — as concentrated in time and effort as for any major crisis we have faced. Such a series of projects will require a partnership between government and private enterprise — and serious federal outlays. The challenge is enormous and too important to leave to the whims of the market.
It would be a mistake to regard this new ‘Manhattan Project’ as nothing more than a cost. On the contrary, developing such remarkable new technologies will create new industries and millions of new jobs.” — an editorial by some local Democratic Party leader
“That means whatever dreams we had of dealing with global warming through an economically efficient carbon-pricing scheme are pretty much out the window.
“What’s left is the hope that somebody invents something really impressive, really quick. Environmentalists talk about this in terms of a “Manhattan project” for energy, which is probably the right way to talk about it. But I’ve been reading a bit about the Manhattan project …” — Ezra Klein, who tried to put his finger on why the usage is idiotic but fell somewhat short, anyway. But he’s one of the current news celebrities given the license to know everything.
“We need something like a 1940 Manhattan project where American scientists worked to produce a nuclear weapon. Gather the best brains in the country …” — an editorial on what to do about the BP oil spill
“The Smerconish Show from 6/9/10 talked about a Manhattan Project to get us off oil. Something along the lines of small businesses locating in Silicon Valley … “ — the Huffington Post, by someone proudly calling himself “Joe the Nerd”
“The U.S. government should take charge of this major national emergency as if it were a 9/11 event. It should assemble the best global advisors, mostly U.S., and treat this like a Manhattan Project in terms of necessity.” — another vox populi/social networking search for solutions, at the WSJ
“Today, a mini–Manhattan Project could find ways to recycle used nuclear fuel in a way that reduces its mass 97 percent and radioactive lifetime 98 percent…” — Newsweek
In fact, the Huffington Post is larded with wishers for Manhattan Projects. None of whom appear to read a bit of what their closest peers write in the blog over.
“After so much rhetoric from politicians of both parties, we must finally embark on the Manhattan Project of energy independence…” — the Huffington Post, by someone named Fernando.
“Create a big, inclusive Brain Trust Project that will leave the Manhattan Project in the dust.” — the Huffington Post, by someone named Sarah, an editor of something called Yes! Magazine.
“After a vicious fight across the Pacific, we needed to defeat Japan without an invasion of the home islands, and by then the Manhattan Project had produced a couple of deliverable atomic bombs.” — the Huffington Post, by someone arguing using the twisted metaphor that, like the bombing of Japan through the fruits of the Manhattan Project, green house gases will not have to be dealt with through curbs — but will be handled in due course through geoengineering and ‘hacking the planet.’
” ‘Getting it right’ instead means implementing a program of Manhattan Project proportions to reduce our use of oil and other fossil fuels …” a newspaper editorial by some professor near Myrtle Beach, SC.
“Many renowned and intelligent scientists expound seriously that large amounts of bovine gasses have a measurable influence upon the temperature rising worldwide. If truthful, I propose the immediate creation of a Manhattan Project for creation of large Beano capsules to be given to the cows in their feed to eliminate this dilemma.” — a tongue-in-cheek letter to the editor in southern Indiana.
The University of Gas, now more appropriate than ever. How to handle raffinose, for not much money and trouble at all.
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06.01.10
Posted in Phlogiston, Rock 'n' Roll at 6:55 am by George Smith
Being Ted Nugent’s copy editor at the Washington Times said to be a lonely and unappreciated assignment:
These brave American warriors and the warriors who have gone before them humble me to my core.
And there can be no Ted Nugent essay without at least one use of “punks.” It’s in the US legal code.
I’m no military tactician, but announcing when we are leaving the battlefield is analogous to putting an ad in your local newspaper to let all local punks and thugs know when you are going on vacation so they can plunder your home.
The Surf Ballroom & Museum [of Clear Lake, Iowa] has announced the addition of Ted Nugent to its summer calendar. The “Motor City Madman??? will return to the Surf on Friday, July 23.
Ted Nugent has been known for performing like a madman since his days with the Amboy Dukes. In the 30 years since departing from the Amboy Dukes, he has established himself as a solo artist.
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05.28.10
Posted in Phlogiston, Stumble and Fail at 9:31 am by George Smith
The genus mean old coot is not exlusive to white America.
In from the wires, this news from Korea, an old man who donated his business fortune to the Defense Ministry:
“Money is dear to everybody, and I’m no exception. Money is as valuable as the blood that circulates in a man’s body. But we have to keep in mind that money can be used as poison or as medicine, depending on how it is spent,??? [said Kim Yeong-Chol].
“So I have decided to spend it on high explosives.”
Kim, who has three children, one son and two daughters, said he didn’t tell his children about his donation because they are still young and ought to carry out their lives without depending on his money.
“My children will probably learn that I donated all my assets when the story goes out and they might feel regretful about the news,??? Kim said. “But I’m sure they will understand my intentions.???
The Defense Ministry said it will invest Kim’s money to build a center to conduct research on new environment-friendly materials. The center will focus on developing new substances that could be applied in cutting-edge weapons designs, such as micro missiles …”
Pap, we’re so happy to hear you’ve taken the family fortune and given it to the government so it can buy more missiles from US and Korean arms manufacturers!
“[Kim] founded and ran a midsized textile company in Gwangju, then sold his facilities to the government and amassed a personal fortune … With the government money, Kim initially thought he would establish a foundation or a school to give back to society,” reads the article.
But that was before his decades long twin desires to have revenge on his family and add to things for people to be blowed up with reasserted control.
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03.19.10
Posted in Phlogiston, Why the World Doesn't Need US at 8:11 am by George Smith
People wonder if the US has lost its mojo.
Well, yes. Yes it has.
There is daily proof, often from the grassroots. Here is some, beyond satire — school science projects in Delaware.
“I surveyed like 50 people and asked them if they had ever been discriminated at an amusement park because they were too short or overweight, and there actually are a lot of people who are too overweight for rides,” she said. “There were like 30 of them who were too big for at least one ride.”
Some people have to stand in line in the sun for a couple of hours before they find out they are too big to fit. Having adjustable belts could rectify that, [someone named] Meekins said.
“I don’t understand why every theme park can’t do that,” [the person named Meekins] said.
Or, there’s this:
Schoolmate Ben Ross also chose a summertime subject for his senior project: “Shark Repellent Technology.”
“I found out what sharks are allergic to is magnets. Not necessarily allergic to, but most sensitive to,” he said. “Sharks have what’s called electric sense in the tip of their nose. That’s what helps them attack prey. I figured I could make buoys that could line the shore. Then I could place an electromagnetic pulse generator on each buoy to keep sharks away during the summer.
“I figured I could turn it off from dusk to dawn, because that’s when sharks normally feed,” he added.
Well, other than they don’t really work there’s the thing that lotsa people often swim in the ocean at night.
Anti-shark electromagnetic pulse rays. This is what it’s come to?
Here.
What’s the matter with a chemical volcano , trial and error composition of gunpowder, or learning what a guinea and feather tube illustrates?
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03.17.10
Posted in Phlogiston, Stumble and Fail at 11:36 am by George Smith
Today, fresh from the predatory career-advice industry: Traits that will guarantee you that raise in the US corporate workplace.
1. Think for the Boss
Find out the key initiatives your company president wants to achieve.
If the president said in the annual report that he wants to increase profit by 15 percent at the health insurance company, focus on that goal. Your work needs to be connected with what the company cares about right now. So get to work writing computer software that will sift clients for penny-ante mistakes on their insurance papers, so they can be targeted for cancellation immediately when they get sick.
2. Be a highly visible lickspittle, not just a cubicle toady
If you stay cloistered in your cubicle, you’ll probably be disappointed when raises are announced — no matter how hard you work. To ensure that you and your hard work are seen, request projects that will get you in front of others — like dunning your colleagues for your boss’s favorite charity — United Way — instead of letting him do it.
This will make it easier for your boss to plead your case to any necessary approvers. “If a boss is in meeting and says, ‘I want to give a raise to Bloor, it’s going to be hard if no one knows who Bloor is. On the other hand, if Bloor has been visibly helpful in collecting monies or in the newspaper defending the company against allegations of fraud or criminal misconduct, they’ll say, ‘Oh Bloor, he’s terrific!'”
3. Be a charismatic apple-polisher
Being a suck up is terrific. But if you really want to go places, your suck-upitude must be infectious, capable of spreading its enthusiasms to your co-workers. Executive coach Lisa Blankfein-Pandit says this kind of interpersonal skill plays a huge role when compensation is discussed.
4. Be subtle
No boss will ever actually come out and say, “I love to give raises to ass-kissers.” So how do you draw attention to this quality without seeming like a finagling braggart? The president and CEO of the National Association of Professional Employer Organizations says that giving your boss a quarterly report on his or the company’s milestones — be it downsizing 100 employees without experiencing any theft or damage to office equipment or how the chief executive figured out how to put a lot less product in a box that looks lots bigger — and asking for feedback is a subtle way to get noticed.
5. Feel for the Boss
The highest-earning employees understand that their job is to make their boss’s life easier. Think about the things that your boss doesn’t like doing — well, just about everything except collecting his end of year bonus or meeting high rent hookers at the Serbian Crown Room or Ruth’s Steakhouse — and ask if you can help by taking over those tasks. It’s also important to understand that your boss can’t always give you what you want, no matter how great your efforts have been to uplift his days. “Most people get keyed up to ask for a raise and when they hear ‘no’ they respond really negatively,” says one career-adviser. “If you instead say, ‘I understand, but when wages are unfrozen, please sir, I would like to be the first in line, remember the many good happy hours you had at the Serbian Crown Room,’ you’ll have a much better chance of getting the raise when they can give it.”
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